Anyone watch Modern Family on ABC? It is awesome! I look forward to it every week. And admittedly, I really like Parenthood on NBC , too. It rocks. They are just different. For now, let’s talk about last week’s season finale of Modern Family. The entire show Claire (played brilliantly by Julie Bowen) is trying to get a family picture (here’s the episode if you are interested Modern Family Season Finale). It’s hysterical, she wants everything perfect…everyone’s clothes (in white), the stairs they are going to sit on, everything (I can’t relate to that, can you, especially those of us who have tried for family pictures before?!)
And of course, nothing goes right. At the end, they end up with a great picture anyway (I won’t ruin it for anyone who didn’t watch it yet), but what caught me was what she tells her daughter when the oldest teenager asks why it is so important to get this family picture. Claire says “When you’re a mom everything goes by so fast…I just want to freeze this moment as it is right now.”
That totally struck a chord for me. She is so right! Even when you think being a parent is so hard, it goes by so fast. That truly hit home recently when we attended my oldest nephew's high school graduation and 18th birthday party. I can’t believe that little boy that I remember holding at six weeks old in Seattle is all grown up. And just think about my brother and sister-in-law…it was like the blink of an eye for them. Austin, my nephew, is handsome, smart, musically-gifted and overall, a great kid. He is going to do amazing things and affect many amazing people, I just know it.
So on the hard days, just remember how fast it goes by and give your kid(s) a big hug, because before you know it, they will be 18 and all grown up.
I have to admit that yesterday was a rough day and I do feel a little guilty about posting the following on my Facebook page, "Drinking a beer at a kid park on Sunday is probably a no-no, huh?! Oh well, it's better than screaming at my child because that was next! Just call it a no-nap 3 year old who can't stop whining!" However, thanks to a few friends whose comments made me laugh and feel better, I now do have to admit that really, truly, we have gotten over a big hump here at our house.
If you recall, when we returned from our ski trip in April, Sydney had turned into what I would consider a demon child (see April posts). In fact, I was dreading the trip to Florida we had a few weeks ago because I was going to be with my child, alone, for four days. Our family would be there, but Jason had to go to Las Vegas for work and so once he left I knew it would be all me. But you know what…we did OK! In fact, we had fun. Can you believe it? I couldn’t. No tantrums, no hitting, minimal time outs, we actually had fun! OMG, have we hit a new place?
Maybe so. And how? I must say I just set my mind to being patient, calm and accepting of Sydney, even when she was not being those things. It was hard, but it felt like once I made that decision and just kept it in mind, we did OK. In fact, we visited Sea World with Mimi (my mom), Busch Gardens with Grandmama (Jason’s mom) and Mimi and swam in two pools. Maybe Sydney was just so exhausted from everything we did that she didn’t have time to freak out?! No, I think she really did do we well and it made me really happy to actually have fun with my daughter. She really is at a fun age with the things she says and the things she can connect now.
So the good news...we don’t have to avoid all vacations in the future, although believe me Mommy and Daddy need some time away (we have that in the works). That’s also something I’ve learned…you (the parents) gotta get away, too, for everyone's sanity!
I swore I never would say this, but recently the number of "why, mommys" have made me crazy and made me say it a lot. Not to mention, I've realized that going round and round with my child gets us nowhere. In fact, the way we have gotten past one of her most recent testing phases was by going back to my gut feeling about being a mom. That is take control of the situation and don't let her run the show. Sometimes, that is really hard, but it has been paying off. My point, never say never and always go with your gut...it's probably right.
Here are three generations and two mommys who have had to use this phrase, let the guilt go!